Miss Carnation

I’ve been wanting to write here since the first week of the year. A new year brings a fresh start, and I found myself excited about a few things—one of them being my new rescue kitten, who unexpectedly changed me for the better. Not long ago, I wasn’t as cheerful as I am today. It took one small, gentle soul to help me see life from a different perspective.   Someone once said, “Happiness teaches us to appreciate what has always been there.” This kitten brought me so much happiness, and because of her I found a deeper appreciation of myself . I saw my strengths, my value, my worth and  many more things that I thought I lacked. Here's more... 1. You Are Tough You stood alone while everyone else crouched under a climate of fear. You were knocked down, and still—you rose every single time. You brushed off the pain, carried your scars with pride, and stepped back into the fight. That’s resilience. That’s strength forged under pressure. That’s you . 2. You Were Present Yo...

It’s two days before Christmas, and here I am trying to convince myself that I should be joyous because Christmas is the most anticipated celebration of the year. But NO. Thank you.  Here are ten reasons why I decided to be a Grinch this Holiday Season. 1. Festive on the inside -exhausted on the inside. With all the hustle and bustle. I had to delay my meal, my pee, even my future just to get everything done. I just can't stop in the middle to attend to people's need to chit chat.  Small talks drains the life out of me. I don't need love. I need to get things done. My temple hurts from forcing myself to smile and return people’s holiday greetings.  My dilemma--I hate Christmas, but I don’t want to drag anyone down with me. So I smile anyway—tight, forced—and return the greetings like a responsible adult.  2. Thoughtless gifts. Okay, I know I should be thankful because it's still a gift, but receiving gifts that mean absolutely nothing to me makes no sense. Is it ...

 I'm back. It's 4 minutes before midnight and since sleep has been eluding me, I'd like to put my thoughts on here. Let me ask you. Yes you. Has there ever been a time in your life when...you think you have become agnostic?   Growing up in a very conservative Roman Catholic Religion I find this a dilemma.  I can't even tell a single soul about this. All my closest friends are like me-religious. You might be wondering what led me to this situation.   See, I've been praying for good things to come. I did my part.  I obeyed  his rules.  BUT nothing.  Nothing is happening.  Sometimes I think God is unfair. I wish I could just write everything here. But I can't.  I'd probably even delete this  post later.   Or who knows? Maybe this is just a phase.  Yeah?  Well, thanks for stopping by. Goodnight. Goodmorning. I'll try to write some more in the days to come. Sampaloc Lake I used to go to lake much smaller tha...

My introverted friend finally tried to experiment with her style and tried on a haltered skinny cocktail dress.  "Mothafacka! You're a bombshell!" I screamed in delight as I watched her emerge from the dressing room. My friend leaned on the wall, mortified,  than amused by the attention we were drawing.  She seldom heard me swear in our four years of friendship. "I'm sorry, I was just so pleasantly surprised by how good you look in that dress!"  I laughed nervously. While her left hand  still clutched at the neckline of her dress she slowly regained her footing.  Without breaking our eye contact,  she flared her nose, then mouthed the words.. "look what you got us into"  turning  her gaze to the small crowd at the other end of the boutique whose judging looks were darted at our direction.  I gave out a smirk and whispered, "big deal".  We have been taught since primary school and in our catechism classes that cursing is  "bad",...

  MY steps were quick and deliberate.  Beads of sweat rolled from my crown down to my neck. It was seven thirty in the morning. People were on a huff either to get to work or students going to school. I refused to make eye contact with anyone. I couldn't be bothered, I needed to finish my daily  2-kilometer brisk walk. Catching my breath on the sidewalk, I paused and took a sip from my Hydro Flask , when an awkward-looking girl in a school uniform bumped into me by accident. “I’m so, sorry Miss”, her hands held out in front of her like she was in a defensive stance. “It’s fine, it was an accident. Just be careful next time” I said, assuring her I was okay. "I’m really really sorry", she kept bowing her head. “I said It’s fine, go run you'll be late” I smiled. “Thank you”  She gave me an apologetic smile and a small bow then turned to walk away. I stood there watching until she turned to the curve and disappeared.  She reminded me so much of my young self. I w...

This is our rescue dog Biskwit.  My son had been bugging me to write something about him or talk about how we rescued him on our Podcast  The Happy Nook .   Biskwit is such an intelligent Pup. He can understand my tone.  Whenever I would walk the other two dogs ahead of him,  he would look at me and wait for me to say that I would come back for him. If I forgot to do that,  he would keep barking until I got back.    I will talk about how we  rescued him on our Podcast soon. Please follow our Podcast on Spotify and also  The Happy Nook FB Page . 

. My mother was a socially active person. She was happy to be around people, especially her sisters,  nephews, and nieces. She loved to spend time with them. When she died four years ago, I received a lot of personal messages.  Most of them were from my older cousins.    The messages I received were comforting words for me and my siblings.  They were words of love and admiration for how my Mom has been so good to them and that she will be greatly missed. If the typewritten words on my chats had tear ducts my computer would have been flooded. I will miss her She has been very kind to me Now I do not have anyone to care for me Now I do not have anyone to turn to when I have a problem Now I do not have anyone to share my heartaches Now I do not have a confidant Now I have no one to call when I am happy Now I do not have anyone to call to side with me Photo by Pavel Danilyuk : These lines are actually common to hear in wakes.  Reading all their kind words for m...